Get Served: Diary of a Hospitality Worker

July 23, 2010

Dear Diary: This obviously isn’t the best time hey

Filed under: Annoying Customers,Bookings,Kids,What not to do — Carrie-Anne @ 12:38 pm

This will apparently come at the surprise of a select group of people whereas to the rest of the world it will come as common knowledge. In hospitality we have very busy times and we have slow times. Would anyone like to take a guess at what the busy times would be? I’ll give you a giant hint, breakfast, lunch, dinner. Look this is obvious right? Nobody reading this right now could possibly be shocked by this right? RIGHT???

Some people just don’t get it.

People who decide to call in the middle of dinner service to book a table for the next week. Food and beverage reps who think it’s a great idea to come in and discuss their products with you in the middle of lunch service (note to reps, if you do this, I don’t give a shit how amazing your product is, you just lost yourself a sale). Hopeful wannabe employees dropping off their resumes (another no no, come in when it’s quiet, you’ll get more attention and we’re more likely to remember you).

I have two favourite stories about this.

Number one; it was a Saturday late afternoon and we were super busy, the restaurant was full of arvo drinkers and snackers. Anyone walking into the venue would see that it was hectic. I was the only one working but I was expecting  another staff member to start her shift soon, I was managing fine but was crazy busy. Enter bad timing woman. I greet her and ask if she’s after a drink or food.

“oh no I want to talk about a booking I have made” she says

FUCK! I say in my head, hopefully it will be quick I think. I grab the bookings book and bring it over to her. “Ok when is your booking and what do you need to change”

The booking is for the next Sunday, she wants to talk about platters. She wants to know what kind of platters we have and what price and how many I think she’ll need and what if I don’t like this can I change it for that. The booking was for the next weekend. I say to her “did you mention you wanted platters when you booked the table originally because generally we need two weeks notice for platters”

“oh no I didn’t I just thought I could organise it now” she says

Groan! So I say in the nicest way I can muster “ok look as you can see, we are really really busy at the moment and I’m the only person here so I just do not have time to go over this with you right now and I’ll need to talk to the chefs to see if they can still do it anyway, how about you give me your email address and I can get all the information together and mail you on Monday about it?”

She seems annoyed “oh I don’t have an email address”

“ok well just give me your number and I can call you then?” I say nicely but shortly to try and speed the process up

She gives me her number I say thanks an bye and assure her I’ll be in contact.

Thank god another worker shows up so I don’t have as much catch up work to get things back under control! The rest of the night goes well as does the weekend. On Monday I open the bookings book to call the lady as promised and what do you know…she’s cancelled her booking. Fuck you lady, fuck you.

Bad timing incident number two happened just two weeks ago, this one was a phonecall. It was about 7pm on a Friday night. Worst time EVER to call a restaurant for a chat, this lady didn’t seem to mind. The phone rings I answer it.

“Hello I was just wondering if you have a childs playground at your venue” she says

“uhhh no sorry we don’t have that no” I reply. Excellent I think, just a quick query I can get on my way… no no I cant

“oh really thats a shame…so there is nothing around there?” she asks

“well there is the beach next door but no play equipment” I answer

“well you can bring kids in can’t you?”

“yes you can’ children are more than welcome we just don’t have a playground or anything, we are too small to have that” I say trying to hurry up the call as its 7pm in the MIDDLE OF DINNER SERVICE!!

“what about games do you have a kids area where they can play games like playstations? I know your sister restaurant does” she asks

Is someone playing some kind of joke on me?? “no, sorry we don’t have a kids area either, yes the other restaurant does but we don’t. We have colouring in books and board games you can play at your table buts thats about it, no special kids only area” I reply WE ARE NOT A DAYCARE CENTRE

Then she really just twists the knife, or cocks the gun more like it with this “well do you know anywhere in Bunbury that DOES have that?”

ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? I DON’T KNOW, GO RING OTHER PLACES UP AND HARASS THEM IN THE MIDDLE OF DINNER SERVICE GODDAMN IT. I think it but of course I do not say it. “no sorry I am not really sure where else has those facilities”

“oh well thanks for your help, you should really get a kids area I think it would be great!” she says

“Your welcome yes well maybe someday bye!” I almost throw the phone at the wall.

Timing is everything. Use common sense and don’t fuck it up!

Love Carrie xoxo xxxx

January 19, 2010

Dear Diary – Don’t worry kids, I won’t tell you off

Filed under: Annoying Customers,Kids,Multi-Talented Waitstaff — Carrie-Anne @ 11:48 pm

“Don’t do that! Or see that lady? She will tell you off”

It’s a threat that is thrown around a lot by Mums who come into my work with their kids. So I would just like to assure all the little kids out there…I am not going to yell at you or tell you off, that is your Mummy’s job and I sure as hell am not your mother because if I was your mother you A: wouldn’t be acting like that or B: I’d be taking responsibility for your actions, because you know, I’m your mother, and that poor waitress you have never seen before isn’t.

Diary, I love kids, I have no problem with kids being in my restaurants. Most kids are more polite than adults! I do however have a problem with parents who don’t keep an eye on their children and who let them run around getting in the way of waitstaff who are carrying plates of HOT food. Let them draw all over tables and chairs. Let them get food everywhere and then don’t even bother to clean it up even a little bit. Leave their kids wet wipes all over the table so when we clear we have to touch them. Parents who stay out so late that their poor kids are falling asleep on our couches just desperately needing to go home but Mummy and Daddy are too busy getting their drink on. Parents who bring in their strollers/prams and park them in between two tables effectively making it impossible for anyone to sit at the other table. It.Drives.Me.Insane. We are not babysitters, this is not a daycare facility and it is also not a playground. Bring your kids in that’s fine, but look after them yourself. It’s called parenting.

Love Carrie

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